Preparation for Holy Communion and Personal Confession:

A Modern Confessional Mirror or Beichttafel

Once you are familiar with the introductory material, you may scroll down the page to the following topics for self-reflection and preparation for deeper encounter with God.

• Reflections on the First Commandment
• Reflections on the Beatitudes
• Reflections on Christian living from The Whole Armour of Truth

Introduction and Explanation:

In the Lutheran tradition, both Holy Communion and personal confession/absolution are gifts of God to assist us in the life of faith.  While we are saved “by grace through faith” as a “gift of God” (Eph 2:8), the faith that saves is given to us by God through means, primarily the Word and Sacraments that are the heart of the life of the Church.

We derive more spiritual benefit from both Holy Communion and personal confessison/absolution when we take time to prepare ourselves to participate in them properly.  The questions and explanations below are to help you do this.

While most people recognize that Holy Communion is received “for the forgiveness of sins” because of Jesus’s words, which we recite whenever we celebrate it (Matt 26:28), under the influence of modern individualism, private confession has fallen into disuse.  Many do not understand the great spiritual benefits to be had by participating in this Sacrament-like Christian practice, so a few words of explanation must be offered:

Why Private Confession?

In the Lutheran understanding, private confession is not done in order for a person to be forgiven by God; the office of the keys entrusted by Christ to the Church (Matt 16:18-19, Matt 18:15-20, John 20:22-23) does not authorize ministers to withhold the proclamation of Christ’s forgiveness from the evidently penitent. 

Rather, private confession of sins is done so that the penitent may have the verbal assurance of an authorized minister of the Gospel that God does indeed forgive their particular sins through Jesus Christ, for the general assurance of absolution given in the regular liturgical life of the Church is often psychologically insufficient to console someone struggling with profound grief or self-condemnation over sin.  As such, private confession is understood as Christ’s gift to His people for their consolation and spiritual healing, what Lutherans have historically called Seelsorge.

Private confession also affords the penitent time for personal conversation and spiritual direction with their pastor, who may be able to help them reflect more accurately on their spiritual struggles, uncover secret sources of sin, or advise them spiritually.

In order for a person to get the most out of this gift of Our Lord Jesus, a person should not only avail themselves regularly of private confession (for consistent spiritual consolation and growth), but should also prepare their hearts and minds for confession by reflecting upon their spiritual condition in light of God’s revealed will in Holy Scripture.

The following questions are traditional, often rooted in the Catechisms, and are meant to stimulate the conscience.  More complete resources can be found in the Lutheran Prayer Companion and Treasury of Lutheran Prayer as well as reputable internet sites.  All such resources should assist people to prepare for private confession or Holy Communion and get the most benefit from these experiences. 

“Taste and see that the Lord is good.” (Ps 34:8)

Reflection on the First and Chief Commandment

All violations of God’s will are in some way a violation of the First Commandment, because while we are sinning in thought, word, or deed by what do or what we refrain from doing, we forget for a moment that God is completely good, loves us more than we love ourselves, and wants only what is best for us.  Every sin is in some way a repetition of the sin of our primordial parents, who sought “to be as God,” deciding what is right or wrong, at least for themselves.  Therefore, the first section of this preparation for confession is an extensive and in-depth reflection on the meaning of the First Commandment.

“I am the Lord your God. You shall have no other gods before me.”

The Large Catechism: “What does this mean, and how is it to be understood? What does “to have a god” mean, or what is God?

Answer: A “god” is the term for that to which we are to look for all good and in which we are to find refuge in all need. Therefore, to have a god is nothing else than to trust and believe in that one with your whole heart. As I have often said, it is the trust and faith of the heart alone that make both God and an idol. If your faith and trust are right, then your God is the true one. Conversely, where your trust is false and wrong, there you do not have the true God. For these two belong together, faith and God. Anything on which your heart relies and depends, I say, that is really your God.”^[1]

Questions for Examination of Conscience from the Lutheran Prayer Companion :

• Have I remembered God often as the great Maker, Sustainer, Redeemer and Sanctifier of my life, or have I thought of my life as belonging to me, as though I somehow created or earned it?
• Have I used first God’s will and commandments as my standard in what I do and do not do, asking myself, “Is this in line with God’s commandment?” or have I thought of God’s will chiefly as an afterthought?
• Have I entertained any ridiculous thoughts, such as, “There is no God”?
• Have I looked up to ungodly examples, trusted in people, goals, or ideologies that are less than God, or thought of myself too highly, following chiefly my own will, satisfaction, or glory?
• Have I feared the opinion of other people more than God, sought their company more than God’s presence, or made greater efforts to gain their esteem than God’s grace?  Have I shown by my actions that I love my friends or family more than I love God?
• Have I not put my trust in material prosperity or the good opinions of people?
• Has my heart found its rest in things such as money, goods, status, and an easy life, instead of seeking delight and joy the eternal good of which these are but shadows?
• Have I perhaps sought the help of manipulative psychological techniques, astrology, divination, or witchcraft rather than the help of God or feared the efficacy of Satan or dark spiritual powers more than the strength of God?
• Has my fear of God also borne true fruit, such as obedience, hatred of evil, remorse for sin, humility, patience, vigilance, and the like?
• Have I sought to know God as the highest good and to love Him above all things?
• Have I diligently sought God’s perfection, majesty, goodness, mercy, power, wealth, and benefits as His child, anticipating these as my inheritance?
• Has my so-called-love for God been chiefly for the sake of His spiritual benefits and temporal happiness or am I seeking God as the highest good in and of Himself?
• Have I seen growing my life the Spiritual fruits of a true and genuine love of God, such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, (Gal 5:22-23) courage, hatred of sin, contempt for worldly values, desire for greater union with God, praise, thanksgiving, and joy?
• What form has my trust toward God taken? Is it a well-founded and childlike trust, or is it presumptuous, assuming I have “rights” before God?
• Are all, or even most of, my desires centered on God and His grace?

While all violations of God’s will are in some way violations of the First Commandment, similar reflection upon the other commandments will often be helpful, especially in regard to habitual sins.  Questions to assist in such reflection are available through the sources named above.

The Beatitudes

In addition to commands, Jesus, the God-Man, tells us in His most extended and famous teaching the Sermon on the Mount (Matt 5:2-7:27) that if we wish to live as people blessed by God, we are to adopt certain attitudes and behaviors. These are commonly called The Beatitudes, and the following questions help us use them as a standard against which to measure our spiritual life:[2]

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Have I truly recognized my complete dependence on God? Have I been proud arrogant and self-righteous in my ways? Have I been selfish, possessive and self-seeking? Have I sought after status power and wealth?

Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

Have I endured difficulties and afflictions with faith and patience? Have I felt sadness for the sufferings of the poor, the hungry, and addicted; the sick, the lonely and the sinful of the world? Have I truly been sorrowful for my sins and faults?

Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

Have I tried to serve or rather to dominate others at home, school, work, office, Church and elsewhere? Have I nursed against anyone? Have I been resentful, bitter, unforgiving or insulting and abusive to others? Have I loved my enemies?

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

Have I truly yearned for God’s will to be done in all things? Have I worked for justice in my family, society and the world in ways with in my reach? Have I tried to cultivate a righteous life through prayer, fasting, worship, receiving Holy Communion and deeds of love toward others?

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.

Have I shown compassion and help toward the poor, hungry, lonely and needy around me? Have I tried to understand and forgive others? Have I been indifferent judgmental or legalistic?

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

Have I loved goodness, purity and holiness? Have I succumbed to evil motives and intentions? Have I given way to impure thoughts, words or deeds? Have I been guilty of bias and prejudice? Have I been hypocritical, pretentious or self-indulgent to sinful passions?

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

Do I have God’s peace in my heart? Have I been unfairly angry, aggressive or impatient? Have I worked for peace at home, work, Church and in society? Have I been irritable, polemical, or divisive?

Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Have I complained when persecuted for God’s sake? Have I prayed for my persecutors? Have I failed to defend anyone in the truth for fear of humiliation or persecution? Have I had the courage to stand up for what is right despite criticism, ridicule or persecution?

Blessed are you when they revile you and persecute you on my account; rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven

Is the joy of Christ in my heart even in trying moments? Have I been pessimistic despondent or despairing? Have I truly delighted in the promise of God’s treasures in heaven?

Questions from The Whole Armour of Truth

Nicolas Varzhansky, a missionary martyred under the Bolsehviks in 1918 who is commemorated by the Orthodox as a saint, was passionate about being honest before God.  He wrote the The Whole Armour of Truth as an aide to prepare for deep, healing confession.  The following questions are drawn from this book, and address the general spiritual life:[3]

Nicolas Varzhansky noted the following, which is perfectly in keeping with a Lutheran understanding of the spiritual life:

Anyone preparing for confession must ask God to help his resolve to tell all his sins. A penitent should prepare for confession and collect his thoughts regarding his sins at least a day before confession. The most valuable thing in the eyes of God is the confession of the sin which weighs most on the conscience.

The questions listed are intended to help the Christian examine himself and identify the symptoms of his spiritual ills; they should not be taken as some kind of test to ascertain how well we are doing as if there was a certain “pass-mark.” Before God’s perfections, we shall always fail. It is for that reason that, as believing Christians, we throw ourselves on the mercy of the Lord and do not trust in our own righteousness.

Remember that our sins can never outweigh God’s love towards us. Even if we should seem to have failed with regard to all the points mentioned [below] and more, we should not lose heart but confess our sins unshamefacedly, we should regret the wrongs we have done, be resolved to make amends, and receive whatever remedy our confessor should be guided to lay upon us. Most of all, one should be assured of the blessing of God which these endeavours will bring upon you.

The following questions are adopted Nicolas Varzhansky’s book:

• Have you used the spiritual truth “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast” (Ephesians 2:8–9, ESV) as a shield or excuse for your own inadequacies rather than a call to profound spiritual transformation?
• Do you pray to God in the morning and evening, before and after meals?
• During prayer have you allowed your thoughts to wander?
• Have you rushed or gabbled your prayers? or when reading in church?
• Do you read the Scriptures daily? Do you read other spiritual writings regularly?
• Have you read books or watched video content whose content is not Christian, is anti-Christian, or is spiritually damaging?
• Have you pronounced the name of God without reverence, joking? Have you asked God’s help before starting every activity?
• Have you made the sign of the Cross, assumed a posture of prayer, or spoken Christian-sounding phrases carelessly or thoughtlessly? Have you sworn? Have you murmured against God?
• Have you sinned by forgetting God?
• Have you been slack in attending church?
• If unable to attend church for some reason, have you nonetheless tried to devote some part of these days to prayer and spiritual reading?
• Have you joined with people not of the Faith in prayer, or attended their worship services?
• Have you behaved irreverently in church?
• Have you laughed or talked in church, or moved about unnecessarily, distracting other people from prayer?
• Have you dressed modestly and in a becoming manner when in church?
• Have you tried to pay reverent attention to the readings, hymns, and prayers in church?
• Have you striven to pray with the service by paying attention, standing, sitting, or kneeling in unity with the assembled body, engaging fully singing, composing yourself prayerfully, crossing yourself, etc., or have you simply day-dreamed?
• Have you ever left church after the Divine Services, and particularly after receiving the Holy Mysteries and immediately engaged in frivolous talk and thus forgotten the blessings and graces you have received?
• Have you been ashamed of your Faith, the Cross of Christ, or Christian practices in the presence of others?
• Have you made a show of your piety?
• Have you used the Christian faith or its teachings to browbeat or belittle others or to make yourself feel superior?
• Have you believed in dreams, fortune telling, astrology, signs and other superstitions?
• Do you give thanks to the Lord for all things?
• Have you ever doubted God’s providence concerning yourself?
• Do you at least try to perceive God’s purpose in all the things that come upon you?

Sins Against Your Neighbours

• Do you respect and obey your parents?
• Have you offended them by rudeness or contradiction?
• Have you insulted anyone?
• Have you quarreled or fought with anyone? Have you hit anyone?
• Are you always respectful to older people?
• Are you ever angry, bad tempered or irritable?
• Have you called anyone names? Do you use foul language?
• Have you derided any that are disabled, poor, old or in some way disadvantaged?
• Have you entertained bad feelings, ill will or hatred against anyone?
• Have you forgiven those who have offended you?
• Have you asked forgiveness from those whom you have offended?
• Are you at peace with everyone?
• Have you left the needy without help when you could have helped?
• Have you attended the sick or elderly when they have asked you to do so?
• Have you shown kindness and attention to all, remembering that God is expecting just such an attitude from you?
• Have you hit animals without a cause or been cruel to them, or neglectful of those in your care?
• Have you stolen anything?
• Have you taken or used other people’s things without asking?
• Have you kept money or things that you were lent without returning them?
• Have you wasted your employers’ time or resources? Have you taken things from work for your own use, used the firm’s phone or other facilities for your own purposes without permission or repayment?
• Are you obstinate, and do you always try to have your own way?
• Have you been inconsiderate of other people’s feelings?
• Have you tried to have your revenge against those who have offended you?
• Have you harbored resentment? Have you deceived people?
• Have you gossiped?
• Have you told untruths?
• Have you judged and condemned others?
• Have you taken pains before approaching for confession to be reconciled with all?

Sins Against Yourself

• Have you been proud? Do you boast of your abilities, achievements, family, connections or riches?
• Do you consider yourself worthy before God?
• Are you vain, ambitious? Do you try to win praise and glory?
• Do you bear it easily when you are blamed, scolded or treated unjustly? Do you think too much about your looks, outward appearance and the impression you make?
• Have you sinned in thought, word or deed, by a look or glance, or in any other way against the seventh commandment? (Adultery, fornication, all extra-marital sexual relationships with others, masturbation, engaging in unnatural sexual acts, fantasizing, pornography, etc.)
• Have you envied anyone anything? Have you been over-sensitive?
• Have you been lazy? Have you done your duties heartily?
• Have you wasted your time, energy or abilities in things that do not profit the soul?
• Have you become obsessive about anything? Have you been despondent or listless?
• Have you had thoughts of committing suicide?
• Have you brought a curse on yourself or others or ill-wished them, being impatient?
• Have you a weakness for alcohol? Have you drunk too much, or become dependent on drink?
• Have you taken drugs, other than necessary medicines? Have you smoked?
• Have you watched television too much or indiscriminately? Have you given yourself up to any other similar pastime which wastes your time and energy and might have harmed you?
• Have you been greedy, either with regard to food or to possessions?
• Have you indulged in comfort-eating? Have you become accustomed to eating between meals?
• Have you been picky about your food, or wasteful of foods, forgetting that so many people are without proper nourishment? Have you been extravagant? Have you been wasteful?
• Do you care for and seek first the salvation of your soul, the spiritual life and the kingdom of God, or have you put earthly considerations in the first place?
• Is there any other sin, which burdens your conscience, or which you are ashamed to tell?

The following quote by the late Pope Francis shows how much the Lutheran Reformation has taken hold, even within the Roman Catholic Church.  It is hard to imagine a more Lutheran way of expressing the privilege we have in private confession:

“One does not go to confession as chastised people who must humble themselves, but as children who run to receive the Father’s embrace. And the Father lifts us up in every situation, He forgives our every sin. Hear this well: “God always forgives! Do you understand? God always forgives!” One is not going to a judge to settle accounts, but “to Jesus who loves me and heals me”  (Pope Francis, September 14, 2021)[4]

I hope that these questions make the experience of receiving Holy Communion or personal confession more meaningful and personally transformative.  Obviously, one would typically use only selections of these questions on any given occasion for preparation, but as one uses them all over time, they can be a powerful catalyst for spiritual growth.

May you be blessed as you walk with God in the life of His Church, receiving the gifts He has entrusted to Her for the sake of our salvation.

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^[1] Kolb, R., Wengert, T. J., & Arand, C. P. (2000). The Book of Concord: the confessions of the Evangelical Lutheran Church (p. 386). Fortress Press.

[2] These questions are drawn from this website: https://www.goarch.org/-/preparation-for-holy-confession

[3] http://orthodoxinfo.com/praxis/selfexam.aspx

[4] https://strose-parish.org/how-to-prepare-for-confession